To The Girls Who Helped Me Through It All

You ladies honestly have no idea what you did for me. Before I met you all, I was ready to drop out of school and go home. I was incredibly depressed, lonely, and upset that I had gone so far away from home and hated it. Then, all of a sudden you came into my life and everything changed. You gave me something to be apart of and made me feel like I belonged. I have never been apart of something so amazing in my life, and I am so grateful for this opportunity. While it has been a great year, I think that my participation in this circle has served it's purpose. It's time for me to move on and find myself outside of what I have become. I feel as if I've had to put up a front and change myself to fit in with you guys, and it's simply exhausting. I don't want to pretend to be someone I'm not anymore. Thank you for helping me through this past year, and I'm sorry that I have to leave so soon.

To My Summer Love: The Boy With The Dog Tags

The night that we first met was something out of a fairy-tale. Not anything Disney worthy, but for me, it was magical. I never thought that what we had would grow to be so strong so quickly. The pace at which our relationship progressed was too much for my fifteen year old psyche to handle, so I terminated the relationship, cut off all ties, and told myself that I would find another you once I was mature enough to be apart of a serious relationship. Now here I am, sitting in my apartment alone, wondering what might have been. You've since moved on. You stopped thinking about me when I stopped answering your phone calls. Now you're 6,000 miles away, doing what you'd always dreamed of doing, and I'm left wondering. Do I ever cross your mind? When you see a movie, do you ever think of that June night when we unknowingly sat next to each other in the theater? I hope you do. I hope you remember the first conversation we had, like I do. I hope you remember the late-night calls when it was too hot to sleep. I hope you remember our summer love, and I hope, I pray, that you don't regret a second of it.

To The One I Ran Away To

I love you. I really do. You gave me a place to go when home was no longer an option, and I couldn't be more grateful. You have opened more doors for me than I could have ever imagined possible. My life is in a place that I never saw it going and I'm a much better person because of it. But, as a newly independent college woman, I need the opportunity to be just that. I need to be able to make my own mistakes and learn my own lessons without being told what's going to happen before it happens. I want to be an irresponsible college girl. There were things in my life that caused me to grow up way too fast and now I finally have the opportunity to have fun, but you're holding me back. I know that you just want what's best for me and I love you for that, but I need to be able to find myself.

To The Ones I Left Behind

I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving you. I know that you understand, but I just couldn't stay there anymore. I worked my ass off through out high school to be able to go away to college and get out of that town, and even though our family started to fall apart at the beginning of the semester, I still had to grow up and move on. I'm sorry that I left you to pick up the pieces. You've never said it, but I know you all resent me for not staying. That place is a shit show and I left you there to fend for yourselves. I understand. I realize that my leaving only made things worse, but there was nothing I could do. I had to move on. There's not a day that goes by that I don't think of each and every one of you and hope that you're doing okay. Apart of me always regrets leaving, but I know that I am better here that I would be there. I just wish that you all will someday be able to leave. A few of you are still too young, but you two older kids will get your time very soon. I hope that when you're able to leave, you will be able to see things from my point of view and understand why I had to do what I did, but until then, I will continue to apologize. There are no words to express how much I miss you. There is not enough time in the day for me to explain how much I love you.

To The Girl Who Left Too Soon

You had so much potential. You knew what you wanted to do, and you were going for it head-on. So why did you get into that car? We went to the same high school, I know you heard all of those speeches before prom about how drunk driving ruined peoples lives, and I know that those people crossed your mind that night, even if just for a split second. I just wish I would have known. I wish that some how I could have been told that the last time we saw each other would be the last time we would ever speak. I would have told you what a wonderful person you had become and how much I looked up to you in high school. I would have told you how highly your sister and all of her friends think of you. Not that any of those words would save your life, but at least you would know that you were a role model and that people were looking at you for guidance. Maybe that would have prevented you from not only getting into a car with an intoxicated driver, but not even buckling your seat belt. But, I didn't, so now you're gone and I never got to tell you just how great you truly are. I hope you know now how many people truly cared about you. The line outside the funeral home during your wake went on for hours, and the temperature that night was a single digit. You truly had an impact on hundreds of peoples lives. I think about you and your family every day. I can't imagine what they have been going through for the past few months. I want so badly to do something to help, but I know that nothing will ever fix the pain that they feel or fill the void that you left. All we can do is keep living our lives